Sunday, 6 March 2011
Dear Vanilla Diet Coke,
I miss you. Why did you leave ? I thought we would be together forever. Just you, me, and 23 of your other friends in one of those handy cubes.
Was it because I was unloyal? Believe me, it wasn't my fault, it's just that some service stations didn't seem to have the fridge space to carry more than the two basic coke flavours. It was always with a heavy heart that I select your blander cousin, Diet Coke, from the fridge. Trips to Kangaroo Island were a killer - was there not one damm place on the whole island with a fridge large enough to satisfy us?
Actually, I think perhaps it's your evil shelf-mate Coke Zero that engineered our break-up. Oh yes, when it moved in it was all shared expenses and shelf space, but then it started labelling it's milk and throwing out your leftovers. I knew from the moment I saw it that we were on shakey ground - how could there be room for all of you in the supermarket aisle? And who is that bottom shelf dwelling Caffiene Free Diet Coke paying off? - I've never seen anyone purchase it - ever - maybe it's kept there as some union deal so the shelf stackers don't have to hurt their backs restocking the lowest shelves.
Oh dear Vanilla Diet Coke, please come back. I'll house you personally in our guest room if necessary - and I'll change the locks so Diet Coke can never return.. Please come home. I won't ask any questions.
loveCathy x o x o glug glug glug